April

Hi readers!  I'm going to try to at least post once a month during The Feast, so this is my April.

Okay, first things first, I haven't broken the fast yet.  It's kinda special so I'm being selective and a bit tentative.  However, this hasn't precluded me from going out a few times with a few different people and just being more social in general.  Or maybe that's just Spring showing up.

On an off note, I may or may not have incidentally given one of the two following dudes very direct access to this blog.  I mean, either of them could find it, really, it'd just take a little digging (though in my experience, dudes don't dig).  This would make said dude privy to my thoughts and impressions, and no one ever really knows what kind of first impression they make on another person, the kind of play-by-play emotional ticker.  You can't walk around knowing that kind of info, man!  That's cheating.  And cheaters never win.

I cannot, however, let this change my bald blogging style.  It wouldn't be fair to you, dear readers.  If I've got something to say, you'll be hearing it, regardless.

Anyway, quite a while ago I may have mentioned a very pretty, tall, pale kid with a smattering of freckles, dark, simmering eyes and dark hair. He looks like Gregor in my book:

Well, I used to work with this guy (like five months ago), and he was actually sweet and nice enough to respect my whole fast thing, and we were supposed to go hang out last weekend.  However, he got held up at a radio interview and we had to reschedule.  Generally I'm not a fan of rescheduling things, so my head went elsewhere after that.  Then he showed up at work a few days later to drop off some flyers and he has now resurfaced in my consciousness.  He's Jewish and I've always been kind of intrigued by Judaism.  I feel like there are secrets in that religion, and whenever there are secrets, I want to investigate.  Anyway, he's got a very low-key style, never raises his voice, lovely smile. He seems like he'd never lose his temper, but he can be just as sarcastic and scathing as me so I'm never afraid I'm gonna hurt his feelings.  He's fun.  Have to see if we ever get together.

Moving on, there's another certain young self-proclaimed non-hipster kid with a mustache mentioned a few posts ago.  We went out for a beer or two yesterday at a Belgian Tap house The Trappist in old Oakland (and a couple other friends came too).  It was really fun and low-key.  He's funny, and smart in all the ways I'm not smart, thoughtful, adorable...and so nice.  Like NICE nice.  I don't think I'd be described as "nice" by anyone so I'm a liiitle worried I'd say something to hurt his feelings one day.  Also, I'm beyond a point where I try super hard when I leave the house.  I wear whatever's on the top of the pile.  He seems like he thinks about that kind of stuff.  Ah, youth.  

I've never been a person who insists on definition. Actually, I love morphing conditions.  So I'm not pushing either of these relationships in one way or the other, just going along and seeing where they lead.  And if they lead somewhere good, or they blow up in my face, I'll let you all know. Vive L'Amour!